irish lady

An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her father cussed her. "Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mum thru?"

The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, Sniff ... Dad ... I became a prostitute..."

"Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! Yer a disgrace to this family!"

"OK, Dad-- as ye wish. I just want to give Mum this luxurious fur coat, this title deed to a ten bedroom mansion, plus a $5 million savings certificate. For me little brother, this gold Rolex and for ye Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside, plus a membership to the country club ... (takes a breath) ... and an invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera and... "

"Now what was it ye said ye had become?" her Dad interrupted.

Girl, crying again, "Sniff, Sniff ... a prostitute dad! Sniff, Sniff."

"Oh! Jaysus, Mary and Joseph! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant! Come here and give yer old Dad a hug!"